Floor!
by EnVyS pEt NeKo2
Summary: A bored Jim is an annoying Jim. Spock’s no fun to annoy, but Bones is! Implied slash Jim/Bones.


**Title:** Floor!

**Rating**: K+ (for swearing)

**Pairing:** Implied Jim/Bones

**Disclaimer**: Star Trek XI belongs to Gene Roddenberry & J.J. Abrams - yea not mine D':

**Summary**: A bored Jim is an annoying Jim. Spock's no fun to annoy, but Bones is!

**Warnings**: None

**A/N: **So this idea was inspired by my friend, Claire, and by Raocow from Youtube. Claire suggested I write a little fic where Jim says redundant little stories to Spock and Bones, trying to annoy them then gets threatened by Bones xD

**Floor!**

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It was a peaceful day on the Enterprise; no weird space anomalies or aliens trying to blow them up just empty space. The life of the ship's busy inhabitants thrummed quietly and Jim Kirk had to admit...

It was boring! He wanted to feel the excitement and adrenaline rush a fight always brought on. Kirk lazily spun around in his Captain's chair, sighing heavily in boredom. His gaze wandered over to Spock who was working diligently on whatever his recent project was. Jim stood, stretching, then walked over to his friend.

"See anything out there, Mr. Spock?" He asked. Spock didn't even look up from what he was doing as he replied, "Negative Captain." Jim leaned against the console, arms crossed in front of his chest.

"Good, good." Kirk said, trying to stop himself from twitching impatiently. He wanted, no -needed- something to do.

"Hey Mr. Spock?" Jim asked. The Vulcan nodded his head slightly and replied, "Yes, Captain?" The younger man shrugged to himself and blurted out the first thing that came to mind, "One day I came over here because I bored and guess what? I'm still bored so I'm going to stay here and annoy you." Spock finally turned his head to look at Jim, one elegant eyebrow lifted in both slight confusion and barely hidden annoyance. Jim just blinked back innocently at him.

"Captain, if you are bored then I suggest you finish the paper work from our previous mission." The elder man said calmly. Kirk blanched and resisted the urge to childishly stick his tongue out in distaste. He shook his head and replied, "No way, unless you plan on killing me with boredom, Mr. Spock!" The half Vulcan just raised his eyebrow again in lieu of rolling his eyes at his captain. Jim just shook his head and grinned.

"Well then I'm going to go see Bones, so you have the conn. Mr. Spock." Kirk said as he turned left for the medical bay.

0o0o0o

"Hey Bones, what's shaking?" Jim asked cheerfully as he walked into sickbay, all smiles and joy. Leonard sighed and growled quietly, already annoyed with Jim's presence. He turned around and felt a flash of dread when he saw that familiar glint in Jim's eyes. It was the glint that said, "Hi I'm here to annoy you because I'm too bored/lazy to do anything useful!" McCoy's eye twitched.

"Dammit Jim, if you're bored then get out of here! My med bay is not your personal lounge room." Bones huffed as he continued to clean one of the biobeds. Kirk just pouted, but walked closer then jumped up to sit on one of the beds.

"Aw c'mon Bones don't be that way. I haven't seen your handsome face all day!" The younger man whined. Leonard didn't even bother to look at his friend, trying his hardest to ignore the man's pathetic attempts at getting him to join in on a nearly non-existent conversation. He briefly closed his eyes as he thought, 'Just picture yourself in your happy place. Your cool office and a glass of bourbon in your hand. It's cold and wonderful as it slide down your throat—'

"Wow Bones, are you fantasying about someone right now?" Jim asked, his voice breaking through the doctor's thoughts. McCoy growled loudly and furiously renewed his cleaning.

"No Jim, unlike you I have morals and a sense of dignity not to slack off on the job!" The brown haired man yelled angrily. Jim frowned and was silent for a couple blissful minutes. Finally, he tentatively opened his mouth and said, "Hey Bones." The doctor grunted and Jim translated that from Bones Speak to mean "what?"

"A long time ago I looked up a phone number in the yellow pages and guess what...I found the number in the yellow pages." Kirk said. Leonard froze, his annoyance with the young captain bubbling up rapidly until he finally -snapped-. The doctor whirled around and grabbed a hypospray.

"Oh yeah? Well guess what Jim! One day I took this hypo and jammed it into your eye then you cried like a little girl!" McCoy exclaimed with a deadly grimace as he waved the hypo in front of Jim's face. The blond laughed nervously as he backed away, Bones immediately following his retreat.

"What's wrong, Jim? You're looking a little pale. Maybe I should -examine- you." Leonard growled as Jim's back hit the cold wall. He raised his hands in surrender and tried to soothe the agitated doctor.

"Bones, c'mon I was just kidding around." Kirk said with an uneasy smile. Leonard grinned threateningly, but the expression suddenly vanished as he dropped the hand with the hypo in it.

"Dammit Jim, why are you such a pain in the ass?" Bones asked tiredly. Jim relaxed as well, bright blue eyes trained on the doctor's exhausted face.

"I don't mean to be, Bones." Kirk said apologetically. McCoy just sighed again and placed his free hand on Jim's shoulder. Those warm, calloused fingers gave the captain's shoulder a brief squeeze as Leonard muttered again, "Dammit Jim." Quick as a flash the hand with the hypo in it moved and Jim yelped at the prick of the needle. His hand shot up to cover the little mark as Kirk's mouth gapped open at Bones.

"Hey that wasn't—!" The younger man began to protest when his eyes suddenly rolled back and he went limp. Leonard easily caught him then dumped his friend on the couch in his office. With a soft snort Bones left the room to continue his duties without interruption.

0o0o0o

It was peacefully quiet when Jim awoke. His neck hurt and he was groggy from the lingering effects of the sedative. Kirk groaned as he placed a hand over his eyes then jumped when Leonard's familiar voice spoke, "'Bout time you woke up, princess." Jim sat up quickly, head pounding in protest as he did so.

"What the hell, Bones? Why'd you go and hypo me like that?" The blond asked with an aggravated frown. McCoy just rolled his eyes and replied, "You were being a pest and just plain immature." Jim pouted, but his answer was already beginning to disappear.

"You're an ass." He muttered. Bones stood up and walked over to the younger man. He plopped down on the couch next to Jim and allowed his friend to lean against his shoulder.

"Should throw you in the brig for attackin' me." Kirk murmured. Leonard chuckled and carded his fingers through the short blond hair as he replied, "You wouldn't." Jim shook his head and buried his face into McCoy's shoulder. Bones just smiled slightly and held Jim close.

End

This well...it can be taken as slashy or as just friendly interaction. I was writing this in a journal for my English class and...yay lol trying to keep the gayness down slightly in there xD Though I could have changed it when I typed it up I like the way it is so I kept it. Oh the title makes no damn sense whatsoever, I had no idea what to call it and Claire suggested I call it "floor" just to throw everyone off. Anywaaay, like/love it/ hate it? Just let me know :D


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